Quick newsletter update: We’ve been on a Monday/Wednesday/Friday schedule since the start of the World Cup …

… which was actually a bad schedule, as USA’s first three meaningful games were all on Wednesdays or Fridays, meaning you guys were reading about games that happened two days ago. “Today in Sports!”? More like “Two Days Ago in Sports!”

So you’ll be getting another newsletter tomorrow, recapping THE BIGGEST MATCH IN AMERICAN (men’s!) SOCCER HISTORY, and then another on Friday. I’m also bumping the “Best of the Rest” section recapping non-World Cup sports until tomorrow.

– Rodger Sherman

I guess we’re a soccer country now. Not how I hoped it would go, but here we are.

FIFA has decided to delay American striker Folarin Balogun’s suspension for the questionable red card he received against Bosnia and Herzegovina. (They actually used the phrase “the match suspension is suspended.”) This means that America’s best player and leading goalscorer at this World Cup will be eligible to play in Monday night’s Round of 16 game against Belgium. Technically, Balogun is on a year-long probationary period; if he were to commit another red card offense, the initial suspension would be reinstated and tacked onto the new one.

The decision has little precedent. FIFA didn’t give any explanation, and made the decision after intervention from Donald Trump. FIFA rigged up an appeal process for Belgium, but the Belgian association released a statement pointing out various inconsistencies in FIFA’s administration of their complaints, and shortly after the appeal was dismissed. In sum: Balogun should be in America’s starting 11 tonight.

First, I’m gonna lay out the facts. Then I’m gonna tell you how I feel.

To summarize: The red card was BS, and the suspension of the suspension was BS. FIFA teaming up with the Trump administration to make this decision was the corrupt cherry on top of the BS sundae. And that’s why you’ve probably seen so many comically absurd opinions about this decision from such a wide array of sources: Every stance you could take is backed by some level of BS.

(The other reason you’ve seen so many over-the-top takes: A lot of people who have never paid attention to soccer before, including but not limited to the President of the United States, are now saying things out loud about soccer. We made it???)

In my heart of hearts, I think the process of overturning Balogun’s suspension was blatantly flawed and mismanaged. FIFA clearly made it up on the fly. I was OK with Balogun remaining suspended for Monday night’s game despite disagreeing with the red card …

… which means I’m now advocating for a great player to miss the biggest game of his life because FIFA put a trash ref in charge of a knockout round game and was too foolish to have a functional, trustworthy appeals process in place. That’s dumb as hell! That’s a stupid dumb awful idiot thing for me to be OK with! And that’s the good option!

I’ve always been tolerant of a little rule-breaking. There’s something heroic and noble about skirting an unjust or stupid rule and getting away with it, like when college teams paid players under the table at the height of the NCAA’s anti-labor lunacy. But winning after the president of FIFA pulled the strings to benefit your team is the opposite of that. If you’ve ever wondered whether you’d be OK with corruption if you were the one benefitting from it … now’s your chance to think it through!

Balogun’s red card was undeserved, but it was the type of everyday sports injustice that has taken place forever in every sports league around the world. It was something the USMNT could have overcome on the field. (In fact, bookmakers thought the matchup between a Balogun-less USA and Belgium was pretty much a toss-up; with Balogun, the USMNT is now a slight favorite.)

Now, even if the USMNT beats Belgium, it’s hard to believe that everything will be settled after the final whistle blows.

The World Cup doesn’t technically have home and away teams. It’s an event where Spain plays Portugal in Arlington, Texas — closer to Buc-ee’s than Barcelona.

But Sunday night, England played a true road game against Mexico in Estadio Azteca. The stadium pulse was at 10, crowd noise at 11, and even the air was hostile at 7,352 feet above sea level. And after 102 of the most heart-pounding minutes of the World Cup, I felt like I needed to catch my breath just sitting at home.

The first 60 minutes were a haywire blend of goals and penalties that left England up two, but down a man after a red card to Jarell Quansah. The final 40 minutes were England hanging on for dear life as Mexico bombarded them with crosses. After the final whistle, they ran to the away end of the pitch and sang Wonderwall.

All things considered, it might have been the most remarkable away win in the history of the World Cup. It’s coming home on the road!

The Vikings row on, powered by two more Erling Haaland goals. He’s now scored in 14 straight competitive matches for Norway dating back to October 2014, He has as many goals in this World Cup (seven) as Norway had in its three previous World Cup appearances combined.

In May 2020, I wrote a piece for The Ringer about a 19-year old Norwegian titled “Erling Braut Haaland can’t stop scoring.” Six years later, he hasn’t stopped yet! (I’m mainly bringing this up to display my ball knowledge after the Clint Dempsey incident.)

For the first time since 1982, Brazil failed to make it to the men’s World Cup quarterfinals. It doesn’t really feel like much of an upset, though — Brazil struggled against Morocco, and needed a late comeback to beat Japan in the Round of 32. The Brazilian program feels like a shadow of its former self. A team that once managed to blend flair with on-field success now loses while playing ugly.

My new favorite World Cup game of all time. I actually got too emotional writing up my recap of the game and will hopefully have it ready for tomorrow’s newsletter. For now, let’s just watch the miracle strike from Cape Verde’s Sidny Lopes Cabral one more time:

Remember how I wrote a newsletter about how nobody knows what they’re doing on penalty kicks, and how players are often being called upon to do something they’ve never done before on the biggest stage of their lives?

So, yeah. Australia sent out two center backs with zero career penalty attempts during the shootout, including 18-year-old Lucas Herrington. Both missed. Nobody is quite sure what the Australian manager was thinking sending Herrington out there. Ahead of the penalty shootout, the Aussies also subbed out goalkeeper Patrick Beach, who was having an incredible game, for backup Maty Ryan. Ryan failed to make any saves. All things considered, it might have been the worst managing job in the history of penalty kicks.

Nobody knows what they’re doing!

Paraguay realized its path to victory against the best team in the World Cup to date was to turn this game into a fight. France said “en garde!” I loved the way Kylian Mbappé accepted the challenge and gleefully hopped into the mud. His expression after his penalty goal was priceless: “If we need to put our hands in shit, we’ll put our hands in shit” Mbappé said in French. “They thought we were going to play in tuxedos, but we know how to play dirty football better than them.”

(Apparently the French word for “tuxedo” is “le smoking.” Which is very funny because the French also famously love le smoking.)

I will now point out the most important fact of the World Cup: The USMNT scored more goals in one game against Paraguay (four) than the Paraguayans allowed in their next four matches (three.) When we played Paraguay, people acted like they were a weak opponent that was easy to beat. Ask Germany and France if they agree.

Truly brutal result for Canada, which actually ended the match with more xG than Morocco. Canada had 33 touches in Morocco’s box, to Morocco’s nine in Canada’s. But Canada couldn’t finish when the game was going their way, and Morocco ripped Canada open with two beautiful counterattacks and scored on a free kick that Canada barely bothered to defend.

Like I wrote two weeks ago: It was somehow the best World Cup in Canadian history (their first draw, their first win, their first trip to the knockout round, and their first knockout win!) and yet a disappointment with so many of their stars injured or underperforming. But the good news is that it doesn’t feel like Canadian soccer is going anywhere.

Gotta say, I’m not exactly devastated to see this Ghana team go out: according to FIFA’s official stats, they managed three shots on goal in four games.

Australian fans throwing a party at the Walmart inexplicably located directly across from the Cowboys Stadium.

You think the employee at the Costco door would’ve been able to keep them from entering without displaying membership?

On Deck is written by Bradley Locker.

🇵🇹 Portugal 🇵🇹 vs. 🇪🇸 Spain 🇪🇸

Monday, 3 p.m. ET in Arlington

NEIGHBOR BRAWL IN TEXAS! Could this be the final international match in Cristiano Ronaldo’s illustrious career? (And will Portugal sub him off again if the game gets tight?) Believe it or not, Spain hasn’t reached the quarterfinals since they won it all in 2010. Winner of this one plays winner of USA-Belgium.

🇺🇸 United States 🇺🇸 vs. 🇧🇪 Belgium 🇧🇪

Monday, 8 p.m. ET in Seattle

With Folarin Balogun now available, the upstart United States eyes their first trip to the quarterfinals in 24 years — and payback for Belgium beating Team USA in the Round of 16 all the way back in 2014, despite Tim Howard’s heroics. Let’s remember:

An American win wouldn’t be the wildest thing ever to happen on a Monday night on Lumen Field …